The "One Upper" is a term I like to call people who always have a BETTER story, a BETTER something to say when you are telling them something. The person that always HAD that experience, the one who always knows someone that has had that something you are talking about; yeah THOSE peeps! You can take this term and apply it to everyday life. I don't think these people just come around soley when pregnant, BUT I do know that when it comes to mom's with kids...the "One Upper" is SO much worse.
Have you ever had a conversation with a friend, family member, friend of a friend, etc. and you are telling them a story, let's say about your kid...and the next thing you know they are telling you something about their kid? Now, there are OK times to talk about your kid, have your friends talk about their kids, etc. I am not referring to those types of conversations, I am talking about the times when you say one thing they say another. Case in point, "Aiden is learning to swim and it's so funny every time she jumps in she comes to the surface and looks" (nameless person)...OH WAIT, that happens to ___. She always jumps in and blab blah blah (that's me tuning out). Here's another example, "UGH I can hardly stand when I get up in the morning and have to roll myself out of my bed..." (nameless person)...OMG me too, I can't even...blah blah blah, (me_, "Right and then when I am in the shower, rushing trying to get myself dressed to make it to the dr. on time, oh my dr. I love her...she is so easy "(the other person) You should meet my dr. she always lets me...blah blah blah. Yeah so you get my drift. I am sure most of it stems from insecurities, but to me...it is just plain annoying! AND a lot of the time, it's a person who I probably think has an annoying kid anyway!!!
I am not sure why when you are pregnant it's like an open door for stories that you SOMETIMES don't want to hear! My FAV. is people who have one kid and are not planning on having any more, and try to talk to you about being pregnant again...UM hello, you can't! Shit like that makes me nuts...how can you be an expert when you did something once? NOT that I am one in ANY shape of form, NOR do I claim to be...but you certainly should not be taking that position either. You experienced it one time, and believe me you one time is not like two times! So that's the "One Upper". If you have to question whether or not you think you are, you are. I think grandparents are exempted because for some odd reason they think everything their grandkids do is spectacular...I am here to say, it is not...and chances are they are just like anyone else's kid, even if you SWEAR they are not. But hell, they are grandparents isn't that what they are supposed to be like? On the other hand I love when women who have children that are older than your kids think they are FULL on parenting gurus. Even if the way they parent, sucks! Whether it's about feeding or clothing or schools. I DO love ASKING people for their opinions, I think that's quite necessary. My advice is to ask the things you want to know to the people you love and trust...I don't like to have to hear their opinions when I don't ask for them. I don't want to hear how you do things and how you think they are the best ways. I don't want to hear your opinion on the schools I am applying to, I don't want to hear the purely organic foods you THINK you feed your child...just don't wanna hear it! If I do, I will certainly ask!
So, food for thought. The next time someone is telling you a story, just sit there and listen. Bottom line.
PS: Saw Enrique on The Today Show this morning, can he be my next baby daddy?!!?!?!?
Have a great weekend, stay cool!
Much love!
XOXO
BTC
No comments:
Post a Comment