THE GREAT DIVIDE

I think one of the hardest things to deal with (on both sides) is balancing friendships with people who have kids and are married, and ones that do not. I feel extremely fortunate to have such an amazing support system on both ends of the spectrum, but know that there is a fundamental difference that cannot be ignored. I guess I am more emotional about it while pregnant, because I realize the spectrum is going to be that much greater, than even with just one child.

I find that my best girlfriends understand the great divide. I also think that some people want to pretend like it is not there because it is not the easiest thing to deal with...I have a handful of close girl and guy friends on both sides, and find it very easy to balance at times, and others not so much. It's hard to make some people understand that balancing all of it at one time, is quite challenging...that no longer worrying about just yourself can be exhausting; BUT yet I choose that life. At the same time, we need to make efforts to understand that those who have not or don't experience what we do find it hard to understand why we are not available like we use to be. The easiest friendships and the best relationships are the ones that can hurdle even obstacles such as this.

I take for example my friendship with one of my closest girlfriends, Lindsay (not married and does not have children yet...). I am constantly amazed at how easy she is...whether it is moving plans because my fat pregnant ass just can't take it, or I have a work conflict, Aiden's sick, Brian needs me to be home...whatever it is, she gets it!!! I think the fact that she has a sister, with 2 kids does help...but I also think she is just a wonderful person with whom I value tremendously. I love the friends that make it all easy, the ones that don't get mad when you need to change a plan, the ones that love you unconditionally even when months go by, and you have not seen each other...those are the best kind of friendships! AND it works both ways...I love when Lindsay says, "B I would love to see you on Sat. AM but I am going to be THE most hungover in my entire life, can we make it another day?" I love that she says that and love that I say, "AH hell yeah...wish I was too!"

In any event, we are now at the age where some of those relationships and friendships will change...so send loving vibes to everyone around you, and know that on both sides it's hard to get it all together. We don't live the life we did at 25 when we can go and do as we please...and if you do still live that life please know that we are super jealous you can do anything you want at anytime. Such is life...such is life...

XOXO
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