THE THANKLESS JOB

How is it that mothers get one day, Mother's Day…but we bust our asses 365! AND when the day actually comes, why is it that we do exactly what we don't want to be doing. We end up spending it with people we love but we are def. not doing what we want to do?!?!? IS it wrong that I am totally bitter? Is it wrong that I would want a MOMENT of time to myself? Should I feel guilty that I am annoyed by the day? Lets discuss the fact that on Father's Day the day stops. I wake up, there's breakfast in bed, there's, "what do you want to do babe, hit some golf balls great go ahead I will watch the kids." Then off to spend the rest of the day with your dad (who thank god is alive when mine is not), come home watch your sports and shit before you go to bed. I mean WHATEVER!! AAA FUCK EVERYONE! :) Happy Sunday night…into Monday, UGH!! XOXO BTC

ONLY TIME WILL TELL...

I am still waiting for that moment when I realize that I am in the "right" place, a place I can feel completely comfortable again like I did in NYC. The time when I look around the room and feel like I can relate to the majority of women I am sitting with, until that time I will just "keep on keepin on!" It's May 3rd, my book now comes out Oct/Nov. 2015 and I am SO incredibly excited, anxious, frightened, and more importantly confident that this was what I was meant to do, to write, speak, share, and that it's what I have been missing for so many years when I worked in fashion. While my love for fashion is great, it's not quite my passion and without passion for what you do there can be no full feeling of fulfillment; it's just not possible. Aiden is sick with the bad cold that I gave her (poor thing), so Brian is off with Lila to a birthday party and we are just hanging out on my bed, watching movies and chilling in a way we don't often get to do! Saturday!! XOXO BTC

INCLUDE EVERYONE…IT'S JUST THE RIGHT THING TO DO.

I am often perplexed at women who don't MAKE their children include everyone, at their birthday parties…when they are of a certain age. I am notorious for making sure that everyone is invited, we all know what it feels like to be left out!I have such a hard time when one of my girls is not invited somewhere, I want to shield them from the cruel world of shitty girls; AND their shitty moms! How can we change this? Can't there be a rule that any kid under the age of like 4th, 5th grade must include everyone from their class (all of the same sex is fine b/c I mean there is still the great divide at that age), and then beyond that they can pick and choose? UGH I love love love having girls, but all the shit they are going to have to put up with makes me want to DIIIIEEEEE! Happy Hump Day! XOXO BTC

WHAT GOES UP, MUST COME DOWN.

I vividly remember as a kid not fitting in, or I should say not aesthetically fitting in and not even realizing that I was beautiful inside AND out. I don't think I realized the magnitude of what it could be like for me until college and by then I had other issues. It's so true that you never really appreciate your beauty until it's too late; and I don't mean just looks I mean the entire package. I know that getting old is just par for the course and for the most part I am totally ok with it, on the flip side I don't recognize myself sometimes when I look in the mirror, even though I am clearly the same person and everyone sees me the same for the most part. It's sad to think I am exactly back to being where I was 30 years ago, but this time so much less time ahead of me. How do we find time to take for ourselves so that we can glow internally and externally? How can we find it within ourselves to love the new versions of us, when we are the same person only a bit more worn and a lot more jaded. More importantly how can we come to terms with the fact that whatever was unfinished years ago, will just have to remain that way…and that we must live in the moment or regret will nearly kill us. Kinda heavy for a Monday, no? ARG…SORRY!! XOXO BTC

Time flies when you are having….

You know how they say, "time flies when you're having fun" it's true it really really is true. And when things are not fun, things just seem to slowly go on and there's nothing you can do it make it go faster, less painful or easier. You just have to wait for the dust to settle and then finally realize why you went through something, as insane as that may sound. I know that everything happens for a reason, when one door closes another opens, good things happen to bad people, and bad things happen to good people…such is life; but sometimes you just want things to be easy, go smoothly and you feel like you deserve that. So why is life so hard? Why do we have to suffer to then be satisfied and why can't good things come to those who wait? It's a ponder type of day for me, lord knows why but it is. I should say reflective. I am always trying to appreciate the things that I have and love those that I am with, but sometimes it's hard to not want more, BE more!!! XOXO BTC

YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY...

Nothing good in life comes easy. Jeez ain't that the truth! I don't know why I ever thought that would go away, or depending on the situation things would just be you know, easy. Never really had it easy and don't know many people who have so all situations although different, are results of hard work, dedication on top of some heartache. JUST when I thought it was all done and handed in, MORE work needs to be done. Not sure how i feel about it. On the one hand I could always talk about things, but on the 2nd hand it no longer feels complete and for someone like me (type A) that does not sit well…more like makes me NUTS!! NOne the less, I have to remind myself nothing in life comes easy…so bring it the FUCK on! HAPPY FRIDAY! XOXO BTC

IT'S NOT OVER UNTIL THE FAT LADY SINGS

….yeah, such is life!!!I feel like everyone I know could use a break. Why is it that certain moms feels like they can give you their 2 cents even when you don't ask for it? It's like you are friends with this person, new friends but friendly enough that certain things about them already annoy you! They inject things and say things and I honestly think they don't even realize that they are doing it; until you pull away and take your kids and run! Sad but true…these are the things that lifelong friends just don't do, I am still getting adjusted to all of those types of changes. It's Thursday, that's a plus:) xoxo BTC